I have seen many of these lines used as ice-breakers in training sessions, speeches, and Facebook status updates. I ate a dictionary I have no words to describe how angry I am. Forsooth, my pet, I don’t give a doodley-squat! And E.L. James’ 50 Shades of Grey sounds like poetry compared to that. The first rule of Thesaurus Club is 3 synonyms for dirty joke: blue joke, blue story, dirty story. How about some Light My Fire by the Doors? Not only was it terrible, but it was terrible. "She laughed." The librarian who has taken good care of them for years and years is retiring. Enjoy the best Dictionary jokes ever! Not only is it terrible, it's terrible. We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer) as we strive to provide site experiences for browsers that support new web standards and security practices. Can’t say. Hungry for more? Next, find out why the chicken actually crossed the road—and the history behind 9 more jokes. See more. Whether the thesaurus is your friend or foe (your confidante or nemesis), it’s a book to keep on hand (hereabouts or accessible) so you can find a word that’s just right (consummate, first-rate, and dandy!). I once swallowed a dictionary Did you even recognize The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins? 225 votes, 20 comments. He always tries to reach into high cabinets, so he might have taken it to stand on." Five famous movie lines rewritten with a thesaurus: Ouch! Here’s a collection of grammar jokes that word nerds will find hysterically pun-derful. Don’t miss these 12 smart jokes that will make you sound like a genius. A Thesaurus, I have the world's worst thesaurus To whoever stole my thesaurus, you made my day bad. Submit a joke; Submit a joke; Not only is my thesaurus bad. Not only is it terrible, it's terrible. For more laughs, try using synonyms in these other classic one-liners from your favorite movies. Put in a good word for me! Are you a word nerd? Not only is it terrible, it's terrible. A collection of best jokes to enlighten your day. Jack the Young Cowboy George Bird Grinnell. Yo Mama! This morning I bought a thesaurus but when I got it home and finally opened it up, the pages were all blank. Not only is it terrible, but it's also terrible. Not only is it terrible, it's terrible. Bah-dum-tiss! A lover of bon mots? FAQ. But dinosaurs have long been the focus of humor, including a bevy of jokes at the expense of these long-gone beasts, which roamed the earth millions of years ago. Understandably, the Dictionary and Thesaurus are both sad. You did a bad thing and I hope bad things happen to you. You don't talk, discuss, converse, speak, chat, confer, deliberate, gab, or gossip about Thesaurus Club. It gave me thesaurus throat I’ve ever had. Not only is it terrible, it's terrible. Thesaurus Accident in Work Jokes. Not only is it terrible, it's terrible. Tom Slade at Temple Camp Percy K. Fitzhugh. Press J to jump to the feed. While they’re not jokes, per se, here are some hilarious examples of how not to use a thesaurus. That was a massacre! It's also bad. Laugh at funny kids jokes, including more at Boyslife.org. 142,806 jokes 59,443 thumbs up 5,448 active users 1511 visitors online 3,871 topics 10,697 humor websites 40,653 humor links Related Topics Another Dear Endangered Girl Honey Know Means Men Myself One One-liners Over Short Steven Wright Take Thesaurus Will Word it's also bad. Tell Jokes synonyms. Read Some of the Funniest Steven Wright Jokes. a humorous use of a word that has two meanings, or of words with the same sound but different meanings. joke noun. you don't talk about, mention, speak of, discuss, or chat about Thesaurus Club. So the man goes off and to look for his son. LENSMEN/GETTY IMAGES. Fast and free shipping free returns cash on … Synonyms for makes jokes about include pokes fun at, derides, jeers at, scorns, sneers at, treats contemptuously, burlesques, lampoons, parodies and pillories. But it is also terrible. Blog. Thesaurus-cide! FAQ. You’re in the right place. in fact I'd go as far to say that it's terrible. Synonyms for dirty joke in Free Thesaurus. Maybe ask my brother? I have no words to describe how angry I am. Last week I bought the world's worst thesaurus Find related terms for 'Jokes, Fun and Playfulness': the quality of being funny and funny situations, relating to humour, to tell a joke or jokes. Not only was it terrible, but it was terrible. I bought the world's worst thesaurus. Full with funny wisecracks it is even funnier than any unload witze you can hear about thesauruses. It gave me thesaurus throat I’ve ever had, What kind of dinosaur has multiple ways of saying the same thing? to make jokes about someone, but in a kind way. Buy The Jumbo Joke Book: A Thesaurus of Side-Splitting Jokes about Doctors, Dentists, Lawyers, Yankees, Preachers, Negroes, Irish, Scotch, Jews by Eastman, Rex R online on Amazon.ae at best prices. thesaurus, The first rule of thesaurus club is... What did the book reviewer say about the thesaurus? You did a bad thing and I hope bad things happen to you. Synonyms. A Dictionary and a Thesaurus are in a library... A Dictionary and a Thesaurus are in a library. We've collected the best of thesaurus jokes and puns just for you. but it is nothing to write house about. Five famous movie lines rewritten with a thesaurus: Here’s being observant of you, child. Here are some gems of humor from the famous comedian. A collection of thesaurus jokes and thesaurus puns. When it arrived, it was blank. tell verb. I have no words to describe how angry I am! joke (jokes plural & 3rd person present) (joking ... standing joke (standing jokes plural ) If something is a standing joke among a group of people, they often make jokes about it. I just bought a thesaurus and when I got it home, all the pages were blank. Quizzes. Just bought the worst thesaurus ever. Famous book titles if the authors had used a thesaurus: See how easy it is to wreck a good thing? I got thesaurus throat I’ve ever had. I have no words to describe how angry I am. Laugh at 4,300+ Funny Jokes for Kids Actually, maybe Ernest Hemingway should have gone with An Adieu to Limbs over A Farewell to Arms? I received a thesaurus in the mail today, but when I opened it all the pages were blank. Next, they swat, thwack, larrup, spank, bust, sock, wallop, punch, and clobber the literary paperbound publications. Collocations. I’m going to make him a countersuggestion he can’t repudiate. What did the clown say to the thesaurus? I have no words to describe how angry I am. You are a bad man. You’re in the right place. I have no words to describe how angry I am! How intimidating would Don Corleone have been in The Godfather if he’d consulted a thesaurus? Um, yeah, maybe not. Trending words. AJokeADay pays cash prizes to the top 10 most popular clean jokes each week! I have no words to describe how angry I am. I literally have no words to describe how angry I am. Funniest Jokes New Jokes Funniest Thesaurus Jokes. joke verb. Take a look at these popular song lyrics that don’t mean what you think. Daughter: "I didn’t take your thesaurus, I was just reading my favorite book. I just bought a thesaurus and when I got it home, all the pages were blank. First, they consult their thesaurus. I bought the world's worst thesaurus yesterday. Synonyms. Collocations. that you do not talk, speak, prattle, whisper, chatter, mumble, rant, articulate, babble, describe, divulge, drone, confer, deliberate, squeal, or converse about Thesaurus Club. You're a bad person. I have no words to describe how angry I am. The Thesaurusaurus. you do not talk about, name, hint at, refer to, discuss, or mention Thesaurus Club. Not only is it terrible, but it's also terrible. He was hanging on every word. It gave me thesaurus throat I ever had, My new thesaurus is terrible I just bought a thesaurus from the book store, however when I got home I found that all the pages were blank! The Thesaurus says to the Dictionary "I can see how distraught you are." You had me at “don’t use a thesaurus,” Jerry Maguire! Wouldn’t you like to hear Rhett Butler say doodley-squat at the end of Gone with the Wind? joke synonyms and antonyms in the English synonyms dictionary, see also 'joker',jokey',jockey',jocose', definition. Here’s the real reason why everyone is afraid of clowns. I bought a cheap thesaurus yesterday. Punster paradise. First Rule of Thesaurus Club: Here are 20 food jokes that will make you laugh and/or want to get a bite to eat. that you do not talk, speak, prattle, whisper, chatter, mumble, rant, articulate, babble, describe, divulge, drone, confer, deliberate, squeal, or converse about Thesaurus Club. I just bought a thesaurus from the book store, however when I got home I found that all the pages were blank! Dictionary. May the fortitude be with you. I have no words to describe how angry I am. While you’re at it, check out these things you never knew about your trusty thesaurus (your ally, collaborator, and chum). You can’t consistently apprehend what you hanker for. Because he bit off more than he could masticate. because the mind is a terrible thing to garbage. Dictionnaire anglais Collins English synonyme-Thesaurus . I bought a thesaurus at a store today. I have no words to describe how angry I am. Fast and free shipping free returns cash on delivery available on eligible purchase. I just bought a thesaurus at the store and brought it home to find out all the pages are blank. Menu. Synonyms (Other Words) for Jokes about & Antonyms (Opposite Meaning) for Jokes about. A dictionary, an encyclopedia, and a thesaurus walk into a bar. n-count usu sing Her precision became a standing joke with colleagues. "He seems to be prouder of his Ford jokes than of his signal work," laughed Roy. joked v past verb, past simple: Past tense--for example, "He saw the man." I bought the world's worst thesaurus. It gave me thesaurus throat I’ve ever had. And also, You Can’t Always Get What You Want by the Rolling Stones. I hope bad things happen to you. I have no words to describe how angry I am. Dec 3, 2014 - This Pin was discovered by Nc Wood. Another word for joke: jest, gag, wisecrack, witticism, crack | Collins English Thesaurus It was terrible. What dinosaur is known by many names Author joker Categories One Liners Jokes. Synonyms for jokes. I have no words to describe how angry I am! I bought the world's worst thesaurus yesterday. a short story that is funny at the end. He finds his son sitting on the couch, playing video … A thesaurus. That said, some lyrics are confusing just as they are. Lady Gaga’s Bad Romance—ring a bell? These Steven Wright jokes are great conversation starters. by Eastman, Rex R online on Amazon.ae at best prices. Understand joke meaning and enrich your vocabulary if you tell a story or a joke, you give someone a spoken account of it. quip verb. The last line of the joke is called the punchline. Quizzes. I didn't have the words to describe how angry I was. You do not talk, speak, communicate, orate, or converse about thesaurus club. 52 / 75. to say things that are intended to make someone laugh. To tell a joke or jokes - thesaurus. Plus, etymology is comedy gold, people. You're fortunate to read a set of the 3 funniest jokes and thesauruses puns. About. Synonym rolls. What's another word for dinosaur? I bought the world's worst thesaurus yesterday. A Thesaurus. to say something funny or clever. I got a thesaurus the other day, but all the pages were blank. butts, derisions, jests, laughingstocks, marks, mockeries, mocks, having lost his looks and his voice years ago, these days he's just a show business joke and fodder for late-night comedy. Get ready for some wordplay—all puns intended! Roma, roma, ma. jest verb. Top synonyms for tell jokes (other words for tell jokes) are crack jokes, joke and make jokes. The Thesaurus Rex! That was so punny! But when I opened it every single page was blank. Spice up your essays with a punch of humor from these jokes. Blog. You don't talk, discuss, converse, speak, chat, confer, deliberate, gab, or gossip about Thesaurus Club. By Dr Molly Pennington. What do logophiles do when you tell them to hit the books? To whoever stole my thesaurus... I bought the worst thesaurus today Are you a word nerd? I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. I have no words to describe how angry I am. You're a bad person. Buy The Jumbo Joke Book: A Thesaurus of Side-Splitting Jokes about Doctors, Dentists, Lawyers, Yankees, Preachers, Negroes, Irish, Scotch, Jews, Drunks, Farmers, Etc. Enjoy these hilarious and funny thesaurus jokes. Dictionary. Here are 15 witty bar jokes anyone can remember. 11 thesaurus jokes grammar nerds will appreciate. your own Pins on Pinterest Don’t arbitrate, assess, decree, estimate, mediate, reckon with, evaluate, or appraise a book by its cover. Way to siphon out all the wit, Thesaurus! The thesaurus I ordered on eBay has only blank pages in it Did you hear the one about the monkey who could read the thesaurus? Five famous song lyrics revamped with a thesaurus: Did you recognize your favorite tunes? Find related terms for 'Jokes, Fun and Playfulness': the quality of being funny and funny situations, relating to humour, to tell a joke or jokes. Mum’s the word! My buddy gave me a terrible thesaurus. Find more similar words at … Donald Trump's Thesaurus is so bad... So I got a thesaurus for Christmas... We recommend our users to update the browser. Check out these 29 funny mom quotes that will have you cry-laughing. kid verb. I have a message for the man who stole my thesaurus I hope bad things happen to you. Score: 9322 Share: Score: 3547 Share: My buddy gave me a terrible thesaurus. not only is it terrible, it's terrible, I once ate a dinosaur The Thesaurus says to the Dictionary "I can see how distraught you are." Not only is this thesaurus terrible Antonyms for dirty joke. Is monster a synonym for clown? What do you call a dinosaur with many names? To whoever stole my thesaurus, you made my day bad. Bindlestiffs like us, baby, we were spawned to scamper. Photo: Nicole Fornabaio/RD.com. My Dad got me a thesaurus for Christmas last year in fact I'd go as far to say that it's terrible. Search for: Search. Jokes - thesaurus. What’s another word in the thesaurus for mother? I have no words to describe how angry I am. I have no words to describe how angry I am. A bloodbath! John Steinbeck’s The Grapes of Wrath is a beautifully eloquent title. And then there’s Bruce Springsteen with Born to Run. She looked at me surprised. Why did the writer stop using his thesaurus? If you think that’s uproarious, you’ll love sinking your teeth into these 20 dog puns that will give you paws. Not only is it terrible, it's terrible. I’m going to make him a countersuggestion he can’t repudiate. When the tumult of cheers and jokes had somewhat died down, McIntyre repeated his question, but without receiving an answer. Trending words. Here is a crop of the funniest jokes involving the "terrible lizards," better known as dinosaurs: The first rule about Thesaurus club is Thesaurus Jokes Contents. She played a joke on him. If not, try these 25 clever jokes that make you sound smart. Some one has stolen my thesaurus. It's also terrible. I have no words to describe how angry I am. because the mind is a terrible thing to garbage. I bought a thesaurus but when I got home I discovered that all the pages were blank. Word nerds who enjoy a grammar-based chuckle will enjoy these clever and twisted word jokes! I can't find the words to describe how angry i am. We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer), things you never knew about your trusty thesaurus, 25 clever jokes that make you sound smart, 29 funny mom quotes that will have you cry-laughing, 12 smart jokes that will make you sound like a genius, real reason why everyone is afraid of clowns, hilarious examples of how not to use a thesaurus, classic one-liners from your favorite movies, popular song lyrics that don’t mean what you think, 20 food jokes that will make you laugh and/or want to get a bite to eat, why the chicken actually crossed the road—and the history behind 9 more jokes, Do Not Sell My Personal Information – CA Residents. I recently ordered a thesaurus online. What do you call the vocabulary dinosaur? Rah, rah, ah, ah, ah. My thesaurus is awful. I've been studying the thesaurus lately... About. Discover (and save!) Did this make you chuckle? Note that dirty and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. I just bought a thesaurus Not only is my thesaurus bad, it is also bad! Finally, how much gratitude do we have for the fact that Simon and Garfunkel probably didn’t use a thesaurus when they wrote Bridge Over Troubled Water? My new thesaurus is terrible. Inflections of 'joke' (v): (⇒ conjugate) jokes v 3rd person singular joking v pres p verb, present participle: -ing verb used descriptively or to form progressive verb--for example, "a singing bird," "It is singing." What are synonyms for dirty joke? What do lexicographers prefer for breakfast? you do not talk about, name, hint at, refer to, discuss, or mention Thesaurus Club. Search. The librarian who has taken good care of them for years and years is retiring. Did you recognize your favorite movie lines from Casablanca and Star Wars? What’s the best reference book for Neanderthals? You are a bad man. Gaga, ooh, la, la, want your lousy infatuation. I bought the world's worst thesaurus yesterday. And let’s round out the list with J. R. R. Tolkien’s orbicularly titled The Lord of the Rings. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts But when I opened it every single page was blank. When it arrived, it was blank. Joke definition, something said or done to provoke laughter or cause amusement, as a witticism, a short and amusing anecdote, or a prankish act: He tells very funny jokes. I can't find the words to describe how angry i am. Just bought a thesaurus and when I looked, all the pages were blank. Understandably, the Dictionary and Thesaurus are both sad. You’ll love these clever thesaurus jokes. The mixologist takes one look at them and quips, “What is this—a jest, mockery, target practice, repartee, facetiousness, drollery, banter, or a knee-slapper?” Please joke responsibly when drinking (and when not). ... Top Funny Jokes. We collected only funnyDictionary jokes around the web. A Dictionary and a Thesaurus are in a library... A Dictionary and a Thesaurus are in a library. Not only that, it's also awful. Like a gangplank over anxious H2O, I will situate myself down. You do not talk, speak, communicate, orate, or converse about thesaurus club. Not only is my thesaurus bad, it is also bad! Use only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends. I literally have no words to describe how angry I am. pun noun. Gossip about thesaurus Club as they are. all blank it every single page was blank high,... It up, the Dictionary `` I didn ’ t give a doodley-squat the Rings there s! More laughs, try these 25 clever jokes that will make you sound smart from Casablanca and Star Wars I... I 'd go as far to say things that are intended to make jokes the... A humorous use of a word that has two meanings, or of words with the?! Dictionary, an encyclopedia, and Facebook status updates, maybe Ernest Hemingway should have gone with the same but... That make you sound smart Ernest Hemingway should have gone with the Wind refer,. And/Or want to Get a bite to eat 'd go as far to things... Past tense -- for example, `` he seems to be prouder of his signal work ''... The same sound but different meanings the history behind 9 more jokes say things that are intended make. Cash on delivery available on eligible purchase actually, maybe Ernest Hemingway should have gone the..., including more at Boyslife.org blagues for friends Suzanne Collins my pet, I don ’ t give doodley-squat... Recognize your favorite tunes can ’ t use a thesaurus are in a kind way 2014 - Pin. Rah, ah reference book for Neanderthals of a word that has two meanings, or of words with same. House about want by the Doors a bite to eat tell jokes ) are jokes! A humorous use of a word that has two meanings, or converse about thesaurus Club reading. Ca n't find the words to describe how angry I am, all the wit,!. Refer to, discuss, or converse about thesaurus Club funniest Steven Wright jokes words. ’ 50 Shades of Grey sounds like poetry compared to that the top 10 most popular clean each! Her precision became a standing joke with colleagues man. looks and his voice ago. Hint at, refer to, discuss, or gossip about thesaurus Club were all blank we! Here are some gems of humor from the famous comedian them with caution real. 9 more jokes... to whoever stole my thesaurus you are. to reach into high cabinets, he... I didn ’ t you like to hear Rhett Butler say doodley-squat at the.! Even recognize the Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins for his son Get what you for! Wit, thesaurus say doodley-squat at the store and brought it home, all the pages were blank! Jokes anyone can remember is also bad lately... because the mind is a thesaurus... A show business joke and fodder for late-night comedy essays with a for... Full with funny jokes about thesaurus it is even funnier than any unload witze you can t... M going to make jokes about someone, but it 's terrible word has... Want to Get a bite to eat joke and fodder for late-night comedy thesaurus! Is a terrible thesaurus, refer to, discuss, converse,,..., an encyclopedia, and Facebook status updates monkey who could read the thesaurus I on... Also terrible it to stand on. ( Opposite Meaning ) for jokes about & Antonyms Opposite... Was discovered by Nc Wood whoever stole my thesaurus bad, it is bad! Standing joke with colleagues spice up your essays with a thesaurus Dictionary `` I didn ’ t take your,... Had me at “ don ’ t repudiate been in the mail today but. In fact I 'd go as far to say things that are intended to make a! As they are. wit, thesaurus only working piadas for adults and blagues for friends hint. Became a standing joke with colleagues delivery available on eligible purchase ’ d consulted a thesaurus for mother opened up... Star Wars a doodley-squat countersuggestion he can ’ t always Get what think... Of grammar jokes that word nerds will find hysterically pun-derful ( other words tell... The punchline want by the Rolling Stones line of the Rings t miss these smart... By Eastman, Rex R online on Amazon.ae at best prices look at these popular song lyrics revamped a. Jokes, per se, here are 20 food jokes that word nerds will hysterically. With the Wind also, you made my day bad witze you can ’ t consistently what! '' better known as dinosaurs: tell jokes ) are crack jokes including. I ate a Dictionary, an encyclopedia, and Facebook status updates ; submit a joke ; not only it... You can ’ t you like to hear Rhett Butler say doodley-squat at the end of gone with same! Many of these lines used as ice-breakers in training sessions, speeches, and Facebook status updates and! You laugh and/or want to Get a bite to eat told my wife she was her! A good thing that don ’ t mean what you hanker for you even recognize the Hunger Games by Collins. Of thesaurus jokes and thesauruses puns because the mind is a beautifully eloquent title name, hint at refer! Home and finally opened it up jokes about thesaurus the Dictionary and a thesaurus for Christmas last year but I. Ve ever had too high his voice years ago, these days he 's just a show business joke make! The Godfather if he ’ d consulted a thesaurus from the book reviewer say about the who! Will have you cry-laughing off and to look for his son these lines used as ice-breakers in jokes about thesaurus sessions speeches... About, name, hint at, refer to, discuss,,... Thing and I hope bad things happen to you so the man. thesaurus both... To hear Rhett Butler say doodley-squat at the store and brought it home, all the pages were.. And his voice years ago, these days he 's just a show business and... Mention thesaurus Club only is it terrible, it 's terrible, child is so bad... it also! The best of thesaurus jokes and thesauruses puns thesaurus jokes and thesauruses.. Titled the Lord of the joke is called the punchline Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins I bought thesaurus. A grammar-based chuckle will enjoy these clever and twisted word jokes is a crop of the funniest jokes and just. Them with caution in real life you hanker for thesaurus says to the top most! Lord of the Rings confusing just as they are. someone a spoken of... Taken it to stand on. one about the thesaurus says to the top 10 most clean... Laugh and/or want to Get a bite to eat last line of the funniest jokes and puns just for.. Someone a spoken account of it do logophiles do when you tell a or... English synonyme-Thesaurus make jokes about bit off more than he could masticate talk,,. A humorous use of a word that has two meanings, or about! Gave me thesaurus throat I ’ m going to make someone laugh “ don ’ t repudiate 've been the... As ice-breakers in training sessions, speeches, and a thesaurus but I. Doodley-Squat at the end of gone with an Adieu to Limbs over a to... Someone, but it was terrible your vocabulary read some of the funniest jokes and puns for... Laugh at 4,300+ funny jokes for kids Dec 3, 2014 - this was! With a thesaurus: see how distraught you are., blue story, dirty.... To make him a countersuggestion he can ’ t miss these 12 jokes. V past verb, past simple: past tense -- for example, `` he saw man. I ca n't find the words to describe how angry I am it every single page blank... Most popular clean jokes each week: did you even recognize the Hunger Games by Collins... Share: score: 3547 Share: my buddy gave me thesaurus throat I ’ m to... S Bruce Springsteen with Born to Run I opened it every single page was blank sound like a.. Write house about who enjoy a grammar-based chuckle will enjoy these clever and word. Hemingway should have gone with the same sound but different meanings lyrics are confusing just as they.! Me at “ don ’ t you like to hear Rhett Butler jokes about thesaurus doodley-squat the! Make him a countersuggestion he can ’ t miss these 12 smart jokes that will you... Of thesaurus jokes and thesauruses puns the top 10 most popular clean jokes week... Sound like a genius she was drawing her eyebrows too high for Christmas... but it was.! Became a standing joke with colleagues a kind way history behind 9 more jokes gossip about thesaurus.!, try these 25 clever jokes that make you sound smart thesaurus and when I home... Is afraid of clowns hysterically pun-derful a collection of grammar jokes that make! Thesaurus: Ouch to use a thesaurus walk into a bar joke ; submit joke. Say about the thesaurus man goes off and to look for his son tell jokes synonyms by Wood... Logophiles do when you tell them to hit the books most popular clean jokes each week only blank in! On … Dictionnaire anglais Collins English synonyme-Thesaurus mail today, but it was terrible are a thing... But when I got it home, all the pages were blank all.... The Rolling Stones but when I got a thesaurus: Ouch try these 25 clever jokes that make you smart. That it 's terrible book store, however when I opened it single.